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04

The Right Way to Overcome Insecurity in a Relationship

Posted By: Alex Haight on September 4, 2011 at 7:58 am

Perhaps it’s you or perhaps it’s your spouse. Either way, there is some heavy insecurity in your relationship and it could even be at the point of promising to tear your relationship apart. How can you go about restoring trust and a strong foundation for your relationship to blossom and grow?

First, understand that it is totally ordinary to feel anxious or not quite prepared to trust in a relationship when you have been hurt in the past. This , however , doesn’t suggest that insecurity isn’t going to threaten to destroy your relationship.

What it all actually comes down to is trust. Insecurity stems of a lack of trust, whether real or imagined. The way to conquer insecurity in a relationship is to rebuild the trust.

Trust takes time to build, as I’m sure you have heard from alternative sources. But what you may not have heard is that transparency is the key to building trust in a relationship.

What’s transparency and how can it’s used by you to end insecurity in a relationship?

Well, when you break it down, transparency is simply just being utterly open and honest with your spouse about what you do and what they can expect from you. If an absence of trust comes from veiled plans and untold actions, then transparency comes from bringing everything into the light.

Transparency means calling ahead to let your spouse know that you will be working late. Transparency means letting your companion know when you are going out to dinner to catch up with pals. Transparency means voicing your feelings and ditching all of the half-lies and lies of omission that straddle a fuzzy border between integrity and deception.

This is a two-way street, so you and your spouse will need to practice transparency. If only one partner is forced to act with transparency, then it becomes more of a type of punishment or humiliation, and not something that will bring the both of you together.

And it’ll take some time to truly experience the results you are looking for. Do not expect an immediate miracle. Trust needs time and it will need consistent dedication by you and your companion to stay through the original stages while you are waiting for the results to show.

To help you start, it might be an excellent idea to sit down with your spouse and openly chat about the feelings of insecurity in your relationship. Talk about how you both wish to improve things and work together to develop a realistic code of transparency between the both of you that you both can agree to follow.

The road to building trust again in your relationship won’t always be straightforward, but with consistent work and perseverance by you and your partner, you can end the feelings of insecurity.

If you’re feeling insecure in your relatonship and you’re wanting to learn a few ways to resolve trust in a relationship, then check out Save My Marriage Today.

    Filed Under: Marriage and Family Therapist Tagged with ,
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