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After Rough Beginning, a Great-Granddaughter, 3, Blossoms

Posted By: wbhazel1 on December 15, 2011 at 10:00 am

This article was written by Jennifer Mascia of The New York Times and is a heartwarming story about a great grandmother who in her twilight years is raising a three year old.

The story encompasses something for helping professionals of every hue: Domestic violence, substance abuse, severe and chronic mental health issues thrown in with transcultural and generational issues.

Please enjoy this article.

William B. Hazel, III,

After Rough Beginning, a Great-Granddaughter, 3, Blossoms

    Filed Under: Abuse , Anger , Anger Management , Anxiety / Stress , Anxiety Therapy , Individual Treatment , Parenting , Professional Counselor , Psychiatry , Psychology , Social Work , Unresolved Childhood Issues , Violence Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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Dogs Traumatized by War

Posted By: wbhazel1 on December 5, 2011 at 10:58 am

This letter to The New York Times Opinion page is in reference to a previously published article: After Duty, Dogs Suffer Like Soldiers. was written by like me an admitted dog lover. He makes an excellent point in the validation of post deployment like conditions which at times has no lack of detractors. His point is brilliant in its simplicity and straight forwardness: If the comparatively uncluttered mind of a dog can be so negatively impacted by the experiences of combat, how much more the mind of the servicemember? Please enjoy this letter and hopefully it will provide some measure of food for thought.

William B. Hazel, III,

Dogs Traumatized by War

    Filed Under: Professional Counselor , Psychiatry , Psychology , PTSD / Trauma , Social Work , Violence Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , ,
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Treating the Traumas Inflicted on Children

Posted By: wbhazel1 on November 23, 2011 at 11:40 am

This Opinion piece was published in The New York Times and written by Bessel A. van der Kolk, a professor of psychiatry at Boston University School of Medicine, is the founder and medical director of the Trauma Center at the Justice Resource Institute.

It raises interesting questions in the mind of this former child protective services professional and should stimulate dialogue from all helping professionals.

Dr. Van Der Kolk speaks of the development and increased understanding of the effects of trauma as experienced in combat but additionally that served through the experience of an invalidating and nonnurturing childhood.

It was distressing to read that President Obama is proposing a reduction by 70% of funding for The National Child Traumatic Stress Network which was created in 2001.

This network was patterned after The National Center for PTDS and serves to study, evaluate and develop treatment for traumatized children nationwide.

I see the policymakers have not yet learned how the least powerful among us are treated is the way we will get it much later.

Please enjoy the reading of this piece and lets get the word out.

William B. Hazel III,

Treating the Traumas Inflicted on Children

    Filed Under: Abuse , Individual Treatment , Parenting , Professional Counselor , Psychiatry , Psychology , Social Work , Unresolved Childhood Issues Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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Supportive Parenting Perspectives – Sometimes That Is All Your Child Needs

Posted By: Carlos Montebello Xavier on September 8, 2011 at 8:21 am

High school teens could be considered the result of your parenting education, since that much time has been put into it. Yes, you are an experienced pro when your child reaches that age. You will learn that the years will just seem to fly because of all of the activities that are done during these four years. All parents must partake in essential decisions such as career selections and college choices for their children. Of course, it just depends on every person’s likes and family characteristics. But some teens have a very difficult time when it comes to coping with leaving home.

Children can be just like little weasels, at times, and lovable ones though. I’m making this comparison because once you’ve asked them or told them to do something, they will wiggle and struggle and basically do anything just to avoid doing what you want. But those are the precise times when you need to stand your ground, firmly. You’re the only one who understands why you want what you want, while your kid is only looking at the bit that will hurt him or her. All it takes is one moment of weakness and every decision you make in the future will be questioned. So you simply cannot afford to give in and reverse or modify your decision. But, we would also suggest you let your child know their repeated attempts will not be successful.

Depending on their situation, this can make things hard for some parents. We have our faults and shortcomings, yet we want the best for our kids. You don’t want the kids to take part or have certain behaviors you dislike, no matter what misgivings we have. You could let your children understand all this by talking to the them and explaining this, if you think it’s a good idea. Parenting is pressure enough, but also know that you are preparing your children for their future as adults. This starts with you. You have to start somewhere, so try giving your child simple instructions for things to do around the house. Along with showing them these new responsibilities, you also need to be clear about why you are asking them to do this. Feel free to mix things up and have your children rotate doing the chores. But this gets them in the habit of experiencing requests for help around the house. It’s always good to teach your children things that will help them learn many good habits for the future.

Learning some important lessons as well as gaining positive experience are just two of the reasons we feel it is important teenagers get a summer job, as has been mentioned in other articles. The lesson that needs emphasis here is the concept of money management and responsibility. Sit down with your teenager and explain everything to him or her in a positive way. You have to really listen to them and ask them how they feel about saving money. They will be able to learn a lot about money by having to deal with the consequences of their decisions when it comes to money. If they blow their paychecks, then do not give them any money so they will know the feeling and consequences of their decisions.

The whole parenting dynamic changes once children become teens. You can still have a lot of fun and enjoyable times as a family during this period even if there are challenges and obstacles you will have to face.

It is no hidden secret that pleased kids makes a pleased family. And one confirmed technique of keeping the children happy is to take plenty of photos of them and place them up throughout the house. This really is easier than you think if you possess the correct personal computer printer. If you don’t, don’t get worried, they are relatively inexpensively. Seek advice from your neighborhood personal computer store right now.

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    Filed Under: Parenting Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , ,
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Spending Additional Quality Time With Your Spouse

Posted By: Meredith Steele on August 25, 2011 at 8:40 am

Although your spouse is one of the most important people in your life, many people tend to take their husband or wife for granted. However, most times this is done innocently enough, with the thinking that your spouse will understand, always placing a higher priority on the other areas of your life can be damaging to a marriage. Even people with very busy schedules can find a way to spend more time together if they really try.

Rather than frittering away your life on pointless things, like slumping in front of the box at the end of the day, you need to have some time with your partner just to chat with each other. This doesn’t have to be a deep and meaningful, but just a little bit of time for you to spend with each other every day to maintain your relationship.

Constant communication is essential in any given relationship. If you know you’re both going to be busy or preoccupied in the evening, it’s a great idea to spend some time talking with each other at the beginning of the day over a coffee.

Usually, just this small bit of effort to make time for one another will show the two of you that you both still care, and still have a vested interest in the relationship.

Choosing one night of the week as a “date night” can also be a good way of showing your commitment to spending more quality time together. Although the evening doesn’t have to be anything complicated or elaborate, just setting the time aside to do something together as a couple is can make a big difference in a relationship.

It’s also important to be flexible when necessary to accommodate the other person’s needs. Although it’s important to set time aside to spend together, emergencies and extenuating circumstances do occur.

If you need to break a date with your husband or wife, it is important to apologize and arrange another time. If the opposite scenario occurs, be understanding. The two of you will need to be flexible in order to make this work.

Marriage is tough, and there will be undoubtedly some hard times, but it’s important to spend time with the person you chose as your life partner.

This individual has been blogging about relationships for the past seven years. Moreover, the writer loves writing on more subjects, like a key safe and a key ring.

    Filed Under: Marriage and Family Therapist Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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Parenting Strategies For Single Fathers

Posted By: Patronus Lucinda Xavier on August 18, 2011 at 9:19 am

Parenting can often seem like the ultimate challenge because they never stop coming it seems. As well as the usual routine, there are circumstances that may arise that require a journey with your little ones. In spite of the circumstances, you are the sole person your kids depend on when doing family stuff. Any time there are little things that come up; you the parent have the good fortune to take care of it. Not matter how well organized you think you are, there is usually at least one thing that may have gone unnoticed. Of course, this would be the one thing that would surface and keep the ‘never a dull moment’ apparent.

Traveling with a baby requires that you be a master planner and coordinator. Besides that, you can likely plan on the most simple situation turning into something more; plus it seems as if you need to cram enough stuff to last you forever. A few tips for traveling with your baby include simple and common sense suggestions. Diapers – we promise that you will probably need more than you think, so be sure to carry a little more than you think you will need. When you are able, schedule your trip to coincide with you child’s daily routine. Sometimes the original plan may have a few hitches; it is always good to have a different plan to fall back on if necessary. At times on a trip things may not be going as planned, you need to have every base covered as much as possible.

Indeed, there will be times when you aren’t sure of the best thing to do straight away and you’ll be challenged as not only a father but a single parent as well. Sometimes you may find it helpful to have a network of friends who can be there to assist you. Support groups for single dads or parents might be something you may want to consider. It’s easy to find these kinds of groups on the internet and locally. On the internet you’ll most certainly find networks of single parents. You’ll be able to talk with another parent who has experienced whatever you are currently facing. So asking for some assistance shouldn’t make you feel awkward.

Collaboration is crucial when you are in a joint venture raising children. Although it is necessary for older people, it is crucial for the kids. You along with your partner can diminish a lot of your trauma. We advise a constructive and up beat exchange always. Case in point, the majority of parents have their own set of values in mind for their children. Just remember to try to get your thoughts aligned with your partners thoughts. It is crucial that you not make the other parent look bad.

Babies offer special parenting challenges, and you may already know that if you are a parent. However, learning to cope and successfully raise your baby into the formative years and later is rewarding and fun, nonetheless.

It is essential in almost any household to take a break once in a while. Going on a vacation with each other can definitely enhance your relationships. One particular great place to visit is Vegas, because they have plenty of activities for folks of all ages. Seek advice from your travel agent for more information.

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    Filed Under: Parenting Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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Tough Parenting Affection – Instructing Your Children

Posted By: Charles Chisato Xavier on August 14, 2011 at 9:09 am

There is a saying along the lines of nothing good you do will go unpunished. When trying to prepare our children for the challenges of the world and trying to be parents to them, it feels as if that saying targets us specifically. Of course, we all understand what it means to teach our kids various skills they will need. Seeing that it takes a while for adults to grasp the idea that their parents were teaching the valuable life lessons is quite interesting. Sometimes they hated it every step of the way and then later appreciated the lesson once they gained a little maturity.

None of us can forget our last year of high school because we could finally see just a taste of freedom. Then before we could count to ten, it seem like our final year hanging out with all of our friends just seemed vanish. So, you know exactly what they feel and what they face on an almost daily basis. This is the time of their life when you should be supportive by offering your advice and being very much a part of their lives. Positive encouragement is always a good thing regardless of how many times you have to reassure them. Just keep a watch at how well your child deals with the fact that high school is ending and they will be leaving the nest. Then, do what you know is best, and after all those years of parenting. We have confidence that you will do okay.

If they know what’s going on, children and people of all ages tend to be more cooperative. You need to understand that it requires you to be transparent and open about different situations and decisions you made if you want to succeed.

Once they have proved that they are responsible, you can begin the discussion with your child about them having a job. Any kind of freedom is always wanted, but for teenagers with jobs, the biggest benefit has to be spending their paychecks the way they want. Learn to get along with others on a superficial level is another important thing for your teenager to learn as they work outside of the home. It’s never too early to start teaching your children about managing their finances.

In other articles, we have tackled the importance of encouraging teens to get summer jobs as a way to gain experience and learn some vital lessons. Managing money and being responsible are the two lessons that need to be learned here. You have to sit your child down and make sure they are prepared to have the conversation about the topic. Ask them how they feel about putting some savings away, and then be sure you listen to what they have to say. They will be able to learn a lot about money by having to deal with the consequences of their decisions when it comes to money. If they spend all their money, don’t give them anything so they understand what the consequences of their decision is. Parenting at home can be beneficial, especially when dealing with certain types of experiences. For example, we talked about managing money and letting them make their decisions. Even if they spend every penny, they’ll still be safe. Spending all their money will make them realize how frustrating it is not to be able to do something because they don’t have a dim.

To help make it easier to raise a household, you must have control of your money. This will make everything simpler. A good way to do this is to have a checking account, as it permits you much more control over your money. Seek advice from your neighborhood bank for more information.

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    Filed Under: Parenting Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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